For You

hehe. mwah.

malam muda-mudi

i hope we cheered u up lastnite =)

we shud do it more often. buang lamak wah. kurus jua. but next time nda payah mkn la hahaha

be'ah xxx


study tips: dont procrastinate! and i'd like to see anyone who doesnt do so AT ALL.

p/s i tink i've mentioned this b4.. but i'll say it again la. i DONT reli appreciate anonymous comments. so give urselves a name, however silly/crazy/stupid/offensive. please and thank u.

one morning

i feel like a massive weight has been lifted off me shoulders. 3 essays down now. 1 more to go, but i'll do that after my belfast escape. its 2,000 words only anyway, and for law students, thats like, intro and conclusion sja. haha apakan?

anyhoo, i was walking up to uni this morning for my 9o'clock lecture. yes, week 23 and i still have lectures. i was seriously contemplating not to go tho, psl siuk wah tdur pagi hehe. but i needed to send in my essays anyway so might as well. needless to say, i was not in a very cheery mood.

then just before the walk up to eliot footpath i saw two massive black dogs walking towards me with this elderly couple. they werent scary looking plg, despite the huge resemblence to the grim from harry potter aka sirius black the dog. so i was about to just walk on but the dogs got to the fence-y thing first so i took a step back to let them thru first. then the elderly man said to me with a smile:

'tidak suka anjing?'

what? did he just say anjing?

i smiled back at him and asked, 'um.. where did u learn malay?' haha i cudve just walked on but i was so taken aback. i prolly sounded on the verge of rude. he told me that he used to work in malaysia. tres interesting!

somehow that cheered me up. haha i dont knw why but its nice to find some englishman who can speak malay. kalau c ali nda kira, psl he was raised in brunei so even tho ia englishman with broken malay, he still speaks malay =p

oh i so cant wait to go to ireland. where i can hear the sexy irish accent and if im lucky, people talking in gaelic! hehe my kaki sakit tho. ystrdy's football game was prolly one of the most violent games i've ever played. i had my first header -unintentional of course. wani kicked the ball and hit my head =p baik jua nda kana face. and i feel on my behind twice. i dont knw if this means i'm getting better. i havent scored any goals since my first game. ystrdy i was given loads of chances to score, but i suck at kicking the ball. i'm just good in tackling. and i knw that for a fact because i managed to steal the ball from chip 3 times ystrdy. who can say they got the ball from the most skillfull player three times in one game?

apakan. i prolly jinxed my 'handalness' by saying it out. hehe i'll leave it at that then. easter holidays in a week! and leaving for belfast tomoro wheeeee~

much love,
be'ah xxx

2 more weeks

man, UKC is so ketinggalan zaman. most ppl have started their easter hols, are in the middle of it and some end next week. we havent even started ours yet!

anyhoo, 1 essay down. yayy. hehe.

things to look forward to:

allowance - i want to buy the zara tudong and the orangey shoes from office. i blame apip for taking me window shopping. but at least saya tahan, no? i mean, tahan till i have more dosh plg nie hehe.

belfast trip - where i can eat my heart's desire of cakoi. i dont care if i dont find kaya. warm cakoi taste better kosong, in my opinion.

shuk and girlfren's visit - he is finally coming down to canters! and bringing the missus too. about time!

nav and boyfren's visit - the BFF is coming down too! it'll be shopping galore obviously. she wants me to take her to ashford. its a good thing she's coming early in the month.

berlin trip - i am psyched. i dont need to say more. travelling is one of my hidden passions hehe. prolly coz i dont talk abt it as much as i talk abt shopping and exercising.

things i'm NOT looking forward to:

philosophy of law essay - im still clueless on how to write it up. content for the essay is substantial, but i cant seem to type THE first sentence to get me in a flowy writing mood. yea i'm anal like that. mesti first sentence ada wow factor so i can 'feel' my essay. haha or maybe coz its philosophy.

final 2weeks of classes - cant believe they still expect us in class with the amount of essays we have to write up.

aunty tipah and co. leaving - its official. they're leaving on the 12th of april. i least i'd get to see them. leaving for berlin on the 13th btw.

**************************************************************************************

i thrive on lists. huhu. altho making the essay plan/list for philosophy aint helping. the list just keeps getting longer but still no first paragraph. i tink i shud just remove the bullet points and make them into an essay?

i'll do that when im desperate.

it snowed today, in the late morning. was coming down real thick and heavy at one point. unfortunately it didnt settle. ah well. merajuk ku sudah. i dont want snow anymore. im ready for spring and flip flops and breezy clothes. i wanna wear my shades and my spring coat please. im tired of wearing my boots, even if i know theyre gorgeous hehe

much love,
be'ah xxx

Good Friday

i know this is a time and again repetitive question but nobody reli got around to telling me.. so

WHY is it called Good Friday today?

kalau dlm Islam, every friday is good. so maybe they think other fridays are bad?

huhu. lame attempt at a joke. oh wait, i shudve put an 'UHRHRHR' there. gawd saya rindu the old ms crowd and the choir. been reminiscing muchos abt the choir since syubs set up that group on facebook.

so this week has been an eventful week. i've done two-thirds of my property essay and i'm ready to start my phil of law essay after that talk with steve-o the man. been binge-eating for the last couple of days, but i guess essay-writing comes with that price. but the food has been good. specifically, i had the much-anticipated mee jawa aka mee lydia special, after TEN looong months of waiting for the moment.

and shes gonna give me the recipe soon =D then nanti i can make it for me family back home time puasa! my mummy's still gonna be in spore, so i guess i can conquer the kitchen huhu. apakan? time my mum ada, masuk dapur pun payah. well, now that shes in spore, nada power struggle in the kitchen.. yataaaah.

eh kenapa aku lame today? anyhoo, it was maulud nabi ystrdy. went over to aunty may's and cooked and smbhyg jemaah and tahlil =) i got a couple more drawings from the girls, but as usual, i left them drawings there =s teruk jua eh baru 21 sudah lupa2x. it was a nice one too.. with sparkles and sequins. huhu i feel special. kamu sja jadi my little sisters ah?

anyhoo, last nite was a total food fest. the mee lydia was absolutely mouth-watering and sinfully delish! right amount of padas and everything. obviously killed my diet. i had 3 helpings of it haha. kes membalas dendam after so long waiting to eat it. and i know im a bit paranoid now with my weight (most ppl will prolly be rolling their eyes and saying 'ya think??') but because of my mee lydia and buttermilk chicken (probably THE MOST fattening recipe ever. i mean, eggs, flour, milk, butter?) overdose, i decided to go on a detox diet. yes, im admitting that i've succumbed to dieting. but its just gonna be for 3days. haha. i tink thats the longest i can tahan without meat and bread. but i've just stocked up on yogurt so i'd prolly O.D. on that.

i've just heard sad news. aunty tipah and family are leaving soon. yes its been in the air for awhile now but we thought they'd stay till june. but now the word is that after the 28th (which is the day for the national day evening cruise), they're gonna proper pack up and leave. im kinda in a dilemma here coz i'd be leaving for belfast that day, but I NEED to see them before they go. that family has been so nice and hospitable. i'm gonna miss them. esp the belabih rirah and aufa =p hopefully they'll still be around after my belfast getaway so i can say a proper thank u and everything.

okay, moving on to brighter news, my BFFs are coming down to canters in 2weeks time. aku saja label shuk as my BFF coz i knw ali will be jealous lol. when nav dtg, it will be shopping mania! or in my case, window shopping mania. haha sad. but i'm going to berlin so yea.

oh, exam timetables are out. my last paper's on the 22nd. i wanna balik asap, but then my cousin is coming to uk allll the way from australia. so maybe i shud wait and hang with her. liat la. im very indecisive about my dates to balik. to boyfren, this means an extra one month of NOT seeing me. but then i've never spent summer in uk. and jem and apip will be around. how now, brown cow? hehe eh nanti tah bepikir. buat essays dulu.

much love,
be'ah xxx

tulibu dibu douchoo

she got thru and learned a bit of english. thanx bee for the vid lol.

The Glorious Donut

its high time i make a post specially dedicated to the most wonderful food of all times. i may be obsessed about losing that extra bit of fat on my tummy, but i really truly am at heart, a homer simpson - donut lover to the core. plus it makes sense, wat with the new hype about donuts d brunei.

so how did this love affair with donuts start for me? obviously not in brunei. back when we had dunkin' donuts, i was still about 10 and still subjected to my parents' buying permission. if they say no donuts, then i cant reli say anything coz i didnt have the money or the license to drive myself to yayasan to get one. pokoknya i was oblivious to the magical wonders of The Donut. back then, it was chocolate that ruled my life. chocolate and cheese. which, not surprisingly, gave me endless migrane attacks.

but thats beside the point. so i grew up and made do with chocolate and ice cream. yes, if by now u cannot tell, i have an extremely sweet tooth. i think im making up for lost time. according to my mum, back when i was a kid i'd throw away sweets because 'they're bad for my teeth' or sumthing like that. so i finished alevel, came here to the uk and had my first taste of the much-talked about krispy kreme.

ah, heaven! the sugary dough just melts in your mouth. i know some people find it too sweet and i admit, at times i do too, but it was the best thing that has ever made contact with my tongue, ever! we dont have krispy kreme in canters so i made do with the donuts of bake n' bite, which personally, is just as good. there was a time in first year where i'd be eating 2 donuts per day. i even notice the price hike when 2007 rolled in - i was always around the campus shop to check if they have donuts in and i'd come every half hour to see if they've come in yet. okay, that sounds sad, but yea. thats what i did. the campus shop was less than 2mins walk from my room anyway.

needless to say, it was at this time that my weight ballooned to crazy proportions. and i was always going to london and when i came back, its always with not just one, but TWO dozens of krispy kreme. granted, i'd share them with my flatmates, but they'd only take one each, which leaves me with about 15 donuts. crazy days. and i'd finish it in 2 days. i'd have donuts for breakfast, lunch and dinner, plus in between meals. it was obviously unhealthy but at least i didnt become some fat girl with acne all over. maybe just the fat girl part. lol.

old frens would probably know me as a chocoholic but ppl in kent would know better. there was even a time where i wudnt share a donut. thinking retrospectively, i guess that was a bit much. haha. but back then it was like 'rabz does not share donuts'. fullstop. no back-talking, unless u wanted to be subjected to my evil glare. god, that was so karit of me!

so why is The Donut sooo sinfully good? well, u know how bad stuff always taste good? like sugary stuff, fried stuff and bad carbs. well, The Donut is a combination of everything sinful. haha. i guess i shudve figured that out last year but it just crossed my mind. The Donut is essentially deep-fried carbs coated with sugar. putting it that way makes it sound nasty lol but hey, its good! its also versatile. u can have chocolate donut, which covers chocolate lovers, put it with ice cream, give it sprinkles, fill it with whip-cream, give it apple pie filling -oh the possibilities are endless!

i admit, wat with this new me being a bit more obsessed with losing weight, my relationship with donuts have simmered down muchos. just last week alijandro brought back donuts from londres, and i only had 2 out of the 11 he got us. and i ate half a donut in one sitting. thats willpower for u! =p haha a girl who used to eat 3-4 donuts in one sitting; now i eat half a donut in one sitting. at least im not denying myself the pleasure of eating donuts. i'd prolly be suicidal. haahaa.

but now im craving for cakoi. huhu which is just as bad since its fried carbs covered with kaya. i hope i can find kaya later at the thai shop! all this donut talk is making me hungerrs. but yea, me and The Donut will always have a special relationship no matter what. its like me and sushi. both food groups fill that void in me. haha dramatic much?

i'll leave it at that. i think i got my point acrossed. basically whoever invented the donut is a genius!

much love,
be'ah xxx

p/s i wanted to put up this post with a picture of a donut, but i cant decide on one from my google search. they all look so GORGEOUS!

MC 'without you' cover

something funny to brighten up our gloomy essay-writing days. from bulgaria's music idol.




need i say more?

silver lining

so its official. today is exactly 3 weeks away from my first deadline.

am i panicking? no.

should i be panicking? hmm.. good question.

haha i guess its either i've got everything under control or the magnitude of the looming deadline hasnt sunk in yet. we'll see this time around next week.

so anyway, i reserved a book from the library on sunday and it was due back ystrdy.
usually there'll be an email in my student account saying its back in and for me to pick it up but i wanted to get a headstart into my essay so i thought i'd try my luck and just go to the library. plus, ystrdy was the day we could start to change/register our 3rd year modules and i didnt know how to go about it which means i needed to go to campus to ask the law school. honestly, if it werent for the fear of not getting my chosen modules (coz some have limited spaces), i wudnt have bothered walking up to campus. as most of ppl in kent know, to say the weather ystrdy was terrible, is an understatement.

it turns out i needn't have bothered braving the rain and wind. i wore the mac that apip got me for my birthday so i was warm and dry hehe but the warmth of my room was much preferred, ya knw wat im sayin'?

coz it turns out i could change my modules online (which i checked b4 leaving but apparently it was only up after 12 or sumthing) and that the book i needed wasnt back yet. so ystrdy was my second experience in typical terrible english weather and i didnt even have to go thru it. boo!

anyhoo, i've decided to have a bit fun and adventurous in choosing my final year modules, since it will be my last year in kent (insyaAllah). and princess rashidah (in a function where she was guest of honour, i forgot wat) also sed that women should be versatile so thats what im doing!


i dropped evidence law for law and medical ethics and i took a law and literature 15 credit module to give me leeway for a wild module - the social politics of food! hehe. sounds like a made up module but its real. hopefully i get to do a study on krispy kreme or something ahaha. other than that, im taking the usual boring modules i'd need for a bar exemption which are equity and trust and european law. save me from european law! even the sound of it doesnt appeal to me. oh well.. apa buleh buat~

i kenot wait for easter holidays. right now im reading every book i have to get as much content possible into my essays lol. im doing 2 essays which touch on feminism tho, so its like killing 2 birds with one stone - one way research for 2 essays. and yes, questions were chosen on purpose. apa-apa anie, pilih yg sanang! huhu as long as u give ur best la.

i'll leave u guys with that. wishing everyone the best of luck with their essays, coursework and presentations.

much love,
be'ah xxx

Too Much To Handle

they let my girl DANNY NORIEGA go!!

thats just T.M.T.H.

oh well. at least ada masih michael johns and david archuleta.

*sob*

the one with the magic fingers

okay so ystrdy was my first shopping experience this year that didnt involve toiletries or food. i have managed to stay sane and not shop for THREE effin' months. i have been out window shopping and tried out many many MANY tops and dresses in the dressing room but still, i have NOT bought ANYTHING for myself in 3 months.

at ashford, it was my time to SHINE!

i felt like the old me again walking in and out of shops and seeing cut-throat low prices. i was deliriously happy, especially since i had a mission of buying a nice pair of jeans. i cant believe a few days ago i almost wanted to miss all this for a football game. i mean, football schmootball! haha but okay, i found out while trying on jeans that i lost 2 inches, so i guess i shudnt diss footie.


so there i was, in shopping heaven. to top it off, i went with melo and muni, the latter who just happens to have THE magic fingers when looking for bargain goods. i think it was a reward for me being so good at my shopping abstinence. they were both very nice and layan-ing me, helping me find the right size and the right style. i felt guilty plg coz i was a last minute addition to the trip and there i was, keeping everyone up in the dressing room, trying a million pairs of jeans. but they were genuinely (at least i hope so) interested and excited seeing me try on pair after pair which was so nice of them. i ended up buying not one, but two pairs. haha thank u melo and muni for making the shopping trip a good one. i havent had such a succesful shopping trip in aaages.

i wanted to get soo many things than just jeans, tho! i swear these purple sequined sandals and a pair of black suede kurt geigers were calling out my name! but before trip, i set myself a budget for the trip (which i admit, foolishly did not do in previous shopping extravaganzas) and promised myself to stick with THE LIST. which means just buy jeans and NOTHING ELSE. not only did i stick within my budget, there was leftover as well =D the magic fingers of muni started working in ted baker, where she found me two gorgeous pairs, a dark skinny denim and a bootleg washed. tiny dilemma there bcoz both looked fabulous on me but i had a budget to stick with and we were still several shops away from levi's. so i got the bootleg and said bye bye to the gorgeous skinny which was one of the hardest thing i had to do.

but at levi's, i hit the jackpot! haha of course la namanya sudah specialising in denim. so there i was picking out jeans till i had about 6 on my arm, when muni came round with this gorgeous stone-washed pair with lapels on the back pockets and says 'rabz! this is your size. go try!'

into the dressing room i went with 7 pairs of jeans. muni called out 'try the one i picked out for u first!' so i tried them on, and it was love at first try! it was perfect on me so i dint even bother trying on the other 6 pairs that i had with me. but the love story doesnt end there!

to the cashier i went, ready to pay 40quid (which was the marked down price from 75quid) and the cashier says 'thats 20pounds please'

'i'm sorry? 20?'

'yes. its got a further 50% discount.'

'reli? 20??'

'yes. but u can still pay 40 if u want.'

hahahahaha buleeh bangang jua tu sudah sampai nda pecaya the most perfect pair of jeans can be so cheap. pokoknya that was the highlight of the shopping trip. but my weakness lies in shoes. i did try a gazillion pairs of shoes but those that i reli liked didnt come in my size, so balum jodoh ku with the shoes. altho i did get a pair of rocketdog flats (which i kinda need. ish. pasal i needed a good pair of sturdy flats for walking), which obviously wasnt on the list. but hey, im trying! and i still had leftover money from the set budget. i didnt even have to use my back-up budget. now thats will power! hehe apakan?

anyhoo, im just trynna say that wat goes around comes around. i stayed away from shopping, stuck to my weight-loss plan and got rewarded with success! hehe now to transfer that disipline into essay writing skills. so ciao!

much love,
girl with gorgeous levi's.

p/s and thank u to the magic fingers!

Ayat-ayat Cinta

as loyal readers would know, i've never done a movie review. hell, im movie retarded as well as musically retarded. i've never seen moulin rouge till last year and i saw titanic about 3 years after its released. so yea.

anyhoo, this movie, which i have hailed to be as good as the notebook and the atonement love story was recommended by rosie in her post. go to her blog to read her high praise of the movie. (balum ku pandai main link2x anie huhu)

my verdict: over 5 stars. huhu exaggerating much?

ayat-ayat cinta is a love story that has all the delicious ingredients of a classic romance - love triangle, the awkward hero, a scandal, death and an obstacle that hero and heroine will overcome to show that love conquers all. but the cool part about the movie is that its done with an islamic twist so it hits closer to the heart. so maybe in this case, its not reli love conquers all but iman conquers all?

whats more, besides the gripping love woes of the characters, there's also snippets from the Qur'an and hadiths, which i think is simply brilliant, especially the one about women's role in Islam. unfortunately, there's no english subtitles which is a shame reli, bcoz i know bee would enjoy watching this movie. i actually had half a mind to make my lecturers watch the movie! hehe i won't go making a movie spoiler but just watch the movie and u'll know what i mean. i know my mum would love this movie. and ruzanna kaka lukman, i think this is just the right movie for u after ur last post.

so where to watch it? freemanfunky uploaded all 13 parts of it on youtube just for us! his msg is "Khusus buat teman2 yg ada di luar negri..!!" so thats YOU. thank god connection in the uk isnt slow so u can stream and watch the movie at the same time.


also, the movie is based on a book from an indonesian writer. you knw how movies based on books never reli portray the whole novel? same case here apparently. so if u wanna get a real grit of the storyline, get the book. there's also a malaysian translation of it for those who struggle with bahasa indonesia.











anyway, goint to ashford later. wish me luck in finding a good pair of levi's.

much love,
be'ah xxx

coming: FIRST EVER movie review

"cinta dan keinginan untuk memiliki adalah berbeza"

its really late but i just finished the movie and just had to share it. this movie is right up there on par with the notebook (altho i personally don't like it), a walk to remember, the atonement but BETTER because this movie hits closer to home!

will say more about it soon. be good and keep up the essay writing people!

much love,
be'ah xxx

p/s special mention to rosiekins and ya nurul 'izzah for recommending the movie. love yous both

the ants and the grasshopper

moral of the story -save for a rainy day!

why dont they make cartoons like that anymore? cartoons nowadays are just overrated and most are just pointless. like the one atiq mentioned bobobobobobo..

apparently thats the name of the cartoon. and in it, ada a kid wrestler who's strength is pakai bulu idung. sayy whaat?

anyhoo, im just bitter because cartoons of my childhood aren't as good as they were dulu. just look how 'my little ponies' have become. overrated is an understatement.

on another point of contention - i need constant reminding that there's more to life than material things. at times, i think i'm pretty well grounded in terms of being materialistic but on another level, i know i can do better. i should stop wishing for better things and just work for something i want badly. just giving myself a good shake for me to realise that i have it pretty good but there's still room for improvement. live within my own means. dunia jua, but akhirat jangan lupa.

see, thats a varied post for u, from cartoons to akhirat. hehe.

back to my own comfy pace though (and a less serious note), i think i WILL go to ashford. i do need new jeans and a designer outlet that has a motto of 'guilt-free shopping' works for me. i've worked hard from this shopping abstinence and i think its about time to give myself a little something.


okay, if that line of reasoning didnt work, then here's the practical one. i'm a smaller size now and the jeans that do fit me are skinnies.. which i tell u, look obcene on me if i dont wear calf-length boots with. and the weather's getting warmer ie i dont need to wear boots as much. so i do need boot-cut/straight leg/boy-cut/watever-works-for-me jeans. so there u are.

and i dont knw why i need to justify myself here. huhu. but we'll see, i might not find anything i like and end up not buying anything (except maybe millie's cookies). and with the new me, that will probably be true. i'm a bit more fussy now with buying stuff. my closet needs a complete rehaul bcoz theres stuff thats too big, too old and i just plain dont wear anymore. i should sell them on ebay. make money. mwahaha.

speaking of which, i made a spontaneous decision lastnite. i'm going to belfast in about 3 weeks time. most of my deadlines are around that time, so no change to my essay-writing pace. will finally get to kacau the future sis-in-law and eat dayang nabilah's awesome cooking and everything that i've craved. now that i've mentioned it, i havent told kash the date for my mee jawa all-u-can-eat. hmmm..

food food oh food. i love food so much its impossible for me to be skinny. but weight-loss plan still going accordingly. insyaAllah come summer, i'll be at my ideal weight. need to keep up with the yoga and portion-control my meals, and i'm all set! and yea, i dont believe in diets. i cant NOT eat what i want. so i eat wat i want, but in moderation. makes me happier than making myself eat rabbit food. see jirin, take note! =p altho ur losing weight faster than i am. which i admit, saya jeles.

anyhoo, to babu who's reading this, yes i am doing my essays and no, i'm not putting it off. just balancing work and play =)

much love,
be'ah xxx


p/s the grasshopper's laugh macam barney's huhu. suaranya pun bah. haha

shopping or football?

never did i in my 21 years of life EVER thought to hesitate in answering such a question!

is this the new incarnation of the former thrift-spending rabz?

i was at jirin's today and was talking to muni who told me she's planning to go to ashford sometime next week. i asked her when.

"wednesday." she answered.

"but i have football on wednesday!" i said, believe it or not.

muni gave me A LOOK. i asked 'why not go during the weekend?"

another LOOK from muni.

the penny dropped.

"WHY THE HELL AM I ASKING THAT? SHOPPING AND FOOTBALL??" i literally threw my hands in exclamation and thought since WHEN was choosing football over shopping EVER a choice FOR ME??

it was just so absurd. if someone had asked me that question 2 mths back i would have (take note ali. its would HAVE, not would OF) said 'shopping' automatically. it was instinctive, it was automatic, in was in my programme, it was shopping for goodness sake.


but somehow, the wires in my brain have been rewired by the love of running after a ball, kicking people's shins and getting the silly ball into the goalpost.

i dont know whether to jump for joy or weep in horror. sarah and effy who tried so hard to make me play basketball would probably think i've gone koo-koo. ditto my girlfrens and buyai. and the selah boys. they probably think i've been kidnapped by aliens and the one on earth is a clone.

one thing's for sure, my mum and boyfren are definitely sighing with relief at this. save duit buii~~

love,
no-longer-the-manic-shopper-rabz

happy mothers' day

i know in brunei we celebrate it in may, but here in the uk, its today.



for letting me play with ur lipstick as a toddler.
for forgiving me for losing ur expensive earrings in school.
for letting me have the better kain raya.
for sharing my secret about how i exactly crashed the car.


thank you. for always being there, and making me as i am today.

i can go on forever about the things u've done for me - the least i can do for u is to make u proud. and i'm doing my best.

i love you.

always, your one and only princess.