buntu mind

minda saya buntu. my mind is um, (the english word for buntu here). i met up with a few kent ppl tdi.. it was nice. then jirin sent me home and we were talking about how buntu our minds are. i mean, now i understand why ppl do attachments during the summer hols. i haf been jobless and doing nothing for the whole 4 mths of summer and to be honest

i dont like it!!

i keep thinking whether i'll still remember how to do an essay. or even follow a lecture. grrr. next summer tah i do work. kinda late now to do anything harhar. oh god, my mind feels blank wah. i need, like, an essay question or sumthing. just as long as it doesnt entail a math question. i mean, going to the gym is great, i love love sweating but i guess we humans need intellectual exercise too. nyeh. kinda convinces me now that i dont wanna be a housewife. yes ppl, i used to harbour secret ambitions to be a hsewife. kinda like an alpha female with alpha kids, alpha family, that kinda thing. haha but no. i still need the odd intellect challenge now and then. aisehhhmen. haha.

watever. im at that stage now where i cant wait to go back to uni. i reli reli miss bee. i talked to her on msn lastnite. i forgot how we cud read eachother reli well. i knw its gonna be puasa plg and when the time comes to actually leave brunei sedih jua la but then, i cant wait to go to cooler weather (minus the english rain) and wearing voguer clothes and the shopping thre! and having financial freedom!! plus im coming homw in december so thres no worry of homesick hehe coz i knw i'll be home soon =)

oh yes, as promised, a few pictures from zah's bday party.


the 2 lovebirds.. posers!


pretty birthday girl.. hehe shes got make up on coz she just got back frm a modelling job


aladdin's for shisha post surprise party

and here are pictures from adib's surprise birthday party, happy belated 21st!


the surprise-ee cutting his bday cake


the surprise-ers

yes, i got lots of august babies frens. if only my birthday falls in summer.. but the kent ppl are ultra nice during birthdays so i cant complain!

....and i just checked my timetable for this semester. i got wednesdays free! but i got 2 niners.. on thurs and friday! ugh. at least my mondays start at 12. i hope i dont get any seminars at 9. doakan pls.

much love xxxx

shapa rindu saya?

i miss bee. will see u very very soon Bianca Gabrielle Wu! oh yea, im thinking of getting a bike. bee! lets get bikes so we can cycle uphill together!!1 hehe





guess what ive been doing w/o any internet connection? i've been reading! nyahaha nothing wrong with reading. im an avid reader.. its just that i've read every book in my collection at least a dozen times alredi.. so apanah, in the end i read my old elit books.jane austen, r.k. narayan and the lot. and i finished the whole freakin lot. so i moved on to my lil bro's books - his roald dahl collection.

jobless much?

anyhoo, im feeling quite serene today. zah and syura just balik. they were here to hang out for a bit. happy belated birthdays to both of them! i will post up pictures of zah's surprise party nanti when aku rajin. for now, its my thoughts, idle dreams, wishes and just pretty stuff in pictures. i wont say more la. i'll leave u guys with the pretty pictures hehe.











i love the beach =)

just a quickie

my internet at home is down! so now im at the salvation of my cousin who so kindly lent me her connection. lgipun shes beside me so bisai jua d puji sikit hehe.

anyhoo, cant say much for now. im missing the boyfren very much. so im definitely coming home in december. and ive improved in yoga! i can do



this pose! yes, im more flexible now.

bah i gtg. kan grocery shopping. much love!

p/s oh yea, dont miss me too much. u guys wont be seeing much of me bcoz i dont haf internet at home!!!

Commitment Factor - The Capacity to Love

"no matter how head over heels your guy is during the initial honeymoon period of the relationship, it doesn't mean he's ready to commit [to marrying you].

A man might fall in love, which requires the capacity to idealize. this means thinking and feeling like his girlfren and the relationship are uniquely special, enabling him to ignore imperfections, which in turn, makes him feel valued and special.

Loving, on the other hand, involves connecting with the other person, understanding her, and wanting to be with her for who she is, not who he'd like her to be.

While it might be difficult to decipher the difference between the two, one clue is the test of time. faling in love happens early on in the relationship, when a couple barely knows each other's traits and quirks and once the initial love buzz is gone, a man who truly loves will stay while a man who was only in love, will bunk off.

Another major telltale sign of real love is selflessness and the ability to care. does your man make sacrifices for u? is he able to put your wants and needs before his? relationships are all about give and take, but love is more about giving"

-cosmo, august 07 issue

being a bitch means being honest

you.

stop being a loser. dont be jealous coz my boyfren's hot and urs not. be jealous coz he's mine, not urs.

tis nothing personal. i just felt like a bitchy post. shapa terasa.. well, work on ur self-esteem girl.. if u start to doubt ur boyfren's hotness because someone says he's not, then ur a loser.

okay. im the loser. my eyes are red and swollen. i miss my boyfren. i read in cosmo that when ur psm-ing u feel closer to ur boyfren bcoz of a certain hormone being released, making us want to feel loved and to love extra more. well, he's not here. so the best i can do is cry my eyes out.

stupid pms. no wonder women are mental. its the effin' hormones.

wishing every woman in the world a happy and sane pms phase. hah. like thats possible.

much love xxxx

making up

me and the sayang had a happily ever after. how?

a brabisly huge-mongous dinner of my faaaaaavourite sushi and japanese dishes.


and we alredi finished a couple of dishes if u notice the small pile of plates on the left.

aaaaaaand....

new shoes from charles and keith. i have been eying this particular pair of sexy chocolate stilletos with the metallic silver heels (totally high sex appeal) but i havent got round to buying them coz i spent the money on, um, doing my hair and a new baju. im lucky that when it comes to shoes, at least my man gets the hints =D


i hate to say it, but it looks like my anger can be abated with food and shoes. haha.

actually no. i tink the anger was just an excuse for the shoes and food. coz i knw he loves getting me stuff ;) isnt that right sayang?

i am a happy bunny indeed.

on the other side of the leaf (leaf? waat? haha ada jua kan ppl use this expression! no?), he is leaving tomoro. wont be seeing him till next yr =s

unless i balik december. me want to balik december. any sponsors?


much love xxxx

^%##@^%

i didnt enjoy lastnite.

and you're leaving in 3days.

lets wait for u to cool down ey?then u can bring up ur sorry self to apologise for being an ass to me.

mite take 3days. nice rite, leaving a girlfren in an angry state, overnite.

but watever.

*hinting*

how many of us, on msn, text, basically in the electronic word, haf used that *hinting* thing to ask for sumthing directly masked as an indirect request (u get me?)?

i wont go on a tangent abt how the brunei population hints heavily at every lil need and wake, how every girl hints at her boyfren manja-ly, how kids hint at their parents for extra allowance etc etc.

thats jirin's job. *hint* (bah jirin, i gave u a leg up nie sudah.)

see what i mean thre? i just directly hinted that jirin write abt hints but masked as an indirect request.

confused?

saya pun.

okay so lets start with my own kind of waffle jargon that i'm familiar with. i've had this ninggling nagging tug at my heart (or my brain rather, or maybe even my superficial streak. whichever) lately about how *pauses to take deep breathes* a certain someone doesnt do what that certain someone used to do back when we just started, um, back then. see, tis difficult for me to say specifically (bee, i will get the hang of saying this word correctly when i see u) bcoz i dont wanna offend anyone and i dont wanna sound superficial or spoilt either.

so i was talking abt hints. i've been trying to figure out the best way of telling that person what i missed but no matter how many theoretive conversations i come up with, they all always ended up the same way -me sounding like a spoilt brat whos never thankful of what she has.

as u can see, im in quite a dilemma. i feel, erm, less appreciated in a sense that the certain person doesnt do the stuff the certain person did back then. that said, i again come off as a spoilt selfish girl bcoz, honestly, with or without the person not doing what the person did back then, i'm still pretty much very very appreciated.

so does this mean im a spoilt selfish girl?

or it means that im just a normal (as normal as any girl can be haha yes i pay heed to the guys out there) girl in much need of some tender lovin' care?

haiyyyaaaaaaa. next issue wud be how do i tell that person that i want what i want without making that person feel that i dont appreciate the person?

yes, dillema much indeed.

and this is my best, feeble, however u take it, attempt at hinting to a certain someone that i want a certain thing to be done like how things were done back then.

and yes, i do realise that this post is basically useless bcoz, as jem says in her post, subtle or obvious hints do not work. but then again, im a girl and this is wat we do.

bah eh. i've garbled much sudah. haha.

much love!

a bad and a good balances out the day

i was stranded at the mall, after gym session, for 2hrs ystrdy. yes, there i was, all buruk and sweaty (the aircon at the mall helped plg but i doubt it helped with how i smelt haha), red faced and my driver cudnt pick me up bcoz krita rusak. and to make matters worse, he was out of credit so he cudnt reply to anything i texted, which made me evn more frustrated. only after 2 hrs did my mum txt me saying she was picking me up. i huffed and puffed in the car and she said 'i only got the text 10mins ago yg krita rusak'.

so that kinda put me to my place. why didnt i think of texting my mother?? oh yes, coz she was at work. i felt bad after that coz she had to leave work just to pick up not only a stinky daughter, but an angry one as well. i sayaaang my mummy! hehe

but soon after my mood lifted. i took the quickest shower i ever did in my whole life (minus the ones i took during camping trips. coz the washrooms suck) and got picked up by the sayang-yg-sentiasa-di-rindui-yg-sudah-balik -ke-tanah air. hehe. i seriously cant say how seeing him made me happy. and on the plus side, we had sushi for lunch. i sayaaaang my sayang! hehe


bah shapa lgi minta sayang? =p

xxxx

jirin is 20 today!

happy birthday jirin! semoga panjang umur dan murah rezeki. teruskan perjuangan in the never-ending battle of losing weight.

here i'd like to share with u guys a moving story, a success story of how one person succeeded in losing 16kg in just a few months!


this was how he looked like before the harships of dieting and exercising. so what was his secret? well, all it takes is a change of lifestyle! take the typical bruneian boy who eats all the time during his spare time to a frugal bruneian boy living in the uk, counting the pennies for food and bills and walking to skool. the shock of managing ur own money has great consequences besides managing *erm* ur own finances, it also makes u manage wat u eat and u learn to eat only when ur hungry and not when ur bored! and the uk lifestyle of walking everywhere acts as an exercise routine whereas here in brunei u get to drive right up to the front door even if its just 5 mins away. so the results of that drastic change of lifestyle is a super vogue jirin and voila!





jgn marah jirin. after all, its ur birthday. thank u for always being the friend whos always there. i always say this to u, and im gonna say it again, ur a nice guy, too nice! start prioritising ur own needs too. hope u have fun today and i will see u soon. xxxx

simpsons cali

simpsons caliiiiiiiiiiii!!!

see, all it takes for me to get out of my misery of missing the sayang is a cali movie. i watched the simpsons lastnite and it was hilarious. and mind u, i dont even follow the tv series so any reference to sumthing on tv went over my head but it was still cali!!! i saw jirin, saw his point about him gaining weight, but seriously jirin, its not that bad! ke uk sja sebulan kurus kau balik tu! oh yes, and i wore my gold stilettos to the movies. haha every since the uk i've gotten used to flats and stilettos were something i'd used for org kawins, and i've only been to one since i've been back. so its was such a great discovery to feel tall and having longer legs again, plus wearing stilettos with jeans just adds a classy touch, yes?

u see, the plan to watch the movie was.. there wasnt one. my fren came over needing help with her uni application and she got a txt if we wanna join up for the movie. so jln la! haaaaaaii siuknya nda skulah anie. kalau dulu, i had to ask my parents at least one day in advance if i wanna go out with frens. actually, i dont reli think its the no skool part, i tink its bcoz kami tuha sudah, to quote apip hehe. all i said was, 'bu, rabiah jln ah!' and she just nodded and said 'jgn akhir' and nowadays im not even sure wat akhir is. haha prolly coz i dont do the whole lepak thing late into the nite so shes not worried. if im home late, its coz of a late movie. see, aku good girl sudah!

oh yes, i saw the sayang's bro and sis in law lastnite. its weird to know ppl, but they dont knw u. u knw wat i mean? coz the sayang usually shares snippets about the bro and sis in law so i feel like ive known them for as long as i've been with him.. but they dont knw me kan? haha. oh well. its brunei. everyone knws everyone by at least the 3rd degree.

oh and my muscles are starting to act again. mustve pushed myself a bit too far with the 2 consecutive classes last thurs. i felt like i had ran for cross country when i woke up ystrdy morning plus my stomach muscles hurt. too many sit ups perhaps? si ferdie tu punya pasal. i alredi stop but he came round the back and made me do sit ups double time. hehe well with the instructor watching me like a hawk aku buat jua la. haha mind u, this is a class where everyone else were my mum's age and they werent complaining, so i buat la jua! daamn those aunties. they put me to shame with how fit they are!

and saving the best news for last... the boyfren balik esuk!! yaaaaaaaayyyyyy!!!

xxxxx

stilettos cant do yoga

happy birthday to kaka McNuts, a great kaka figure, always generous with her food and loves to have company over. thanx for all the brownies with ice-cream during our pms times, wagamama, ur gilaness, ur bimboness, watching friends and grey's with u daaaan segala galanya.


birthday girl to the right. haha yes, i haf crazy friends.

wishing u all the best in life. semoga bahagia dunia dan akhirat. amiiin~~

on another note, i just had step class and yoga class. classes are fun coz i reli sweat, but this new gym-aholic is starting to miss her random shopping sprees. i need to buy new shoes asap!

today is day four without the boyfriend. yes, i turn to shoes in his absence. shoes never talk back, they always have time for you and are always supportive and they never ever fail to make u look good. and stilettos always always always looks gorgeous on any feet. period. and red shoes. every girl should haf red shoes. red stilettos (just be careful to not overdo it, krg kana ucap pelac). respect to whoever invented stilettos.


arent these just to die for?


see the crux of the matter? arent these just gorgeous??