easy-listening

im overdosing on calming acoustic-y songs lately. jason mraz tops the spot of course.

me laaaaavs his duet with caillat in lucky. also been on repeat are her bubbly and realize songs. they keep playing 'realize' at the gym jua. its a bit of an oxymoron to me coz i like listening to her songs while lying on my back staring at the ceiling. y'know, just taking in her guitar skills. even better, sometimes Brother 4 plays acoustic for me. but then i have to sing. in other words, i *erm* spoil the song. haha.

so yea, when they play it at the gym, i tend to go slower on my treadmill. like reeeeeeal slow while i take in the view of masjid jame' and semeo voctech (the latter which i do not think of quite fondly).

jason mraz's i'm yours is always a favourite of the girl receptionist at the gym. how do i know this? coz its always on every 10mins and i knw only the receptionist spins the songs the blares on the gym's speakers. oh, and she likes usher too. the number of times i listened to 'separated' 'u got it bad' and the likes while pumping iron. hee. but me likey coz i can sing along to it. time shower pun nyanyi. haha.

oh, another fave of mine is 'bring me flowers' from hope. first heard it from rosiekins. thankyews bery much rosie. they dont play it at the gym tho, which is a good thing coz its one of those songs that i need to be in my most relaxed state, not while i'm running 7:03mins per km.

i wish i can play guitar. mcm awesome brabis. the thing is, i've had countless lessons from different ppl and i always give up because my fingers cant bend that way or my fingernails cant stand the pressure of pressing the strings.

imma stick to guitar hero then and leave the guitaring skills to caillat and mraz.

much love,
be'ah xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

my weakness

i found another food that affects me the same way krispy kreme donuts do to me. it may not have the popularity as the brand or as heard of like the donut, but it nevertheless is a strong contender in knocking off The Donut off the top of my to-be-kept-to-a-minimum-when-around-me list.

because whenever this new competitor is in abundance and within my reach, i try to demolish the whole lot until only an empty pyrex is left, only to feel the guilt of my gluttony when i see the scales go up by even 200grams.

the food is question is kueh bom.

nyamaaaaaaaaan nyamoo! i guess in a way its similar to the donut. they're glutinous balls covered in sesame seeds filled with either crushed-up nuts or red bean paste. oh, and they're fried too. deep-fried at that. so its basically carbs fried in fat filled with sugar. as opposed to The Donut which is carbs fried in fat topped with sugar (unless u count the creme/custard/choc filled ones).

skali tadi for tea there was kueh bom on the table, just inviting me to demolish the whole lot. banyak lagi tu! (well, between the 7 of us plus dad, we can usualy finish off watever's on the table plg) i took one, then went of to pick up Brother 6 from school. it was like, if i stayed around longer i wud've eaten more than i needed so i had to get out quick. dramatic plg story nya nie but true story! bukan skema.. if im using the word right? hehe

came back with Brother 6. i checked dining room table. aarrgh. still banyak kueh bom. took another one and went to my room. decided i was thirsty so went to the kitchen to get water. passed the dining table so i took another one. came back to my room. just before 5, went out to pick up Brother 5 and upon coming back, took another kueh bom.

then i thought, nda jua siuk nie denying myself of what i want. sudah d uk mana ada, krg menyasal. so i sat at the dining table, took another one and started reading today's newspaper.

had another ball while reading and my eyes feel upon an article about weight loss. skali it said jgn makan time buat other things eg reading watching tv. i looked to my right hand where the evidence of a half-eaten kueh bomb was still there. finished it up and went back to my room.

i was okay for about 5mins skali i went to the dining room again, just to check if masih ada atau nda kueh bom. its like i cant be at peace till i know its all gone so i dont have to fear eating another one unnecessarily. lo and behold, there were 3 kueh boms left!

i automatically took one.

tinggal 2. i think i was the only one interested in eating the kueh. mcm nda begarak wah dari meja ah. but then i had a brilliant idea.

to the living room at large, where 4 brothers were doing their own thing (from rubik's cube sawing -dont ask- to homework) i asked 'shapa mau kueh bom?'

Brother 2 and Brother 4 said 'mauuuu'. so i promptly gave them each one kueh bom. there. all gone.

i can finally be at peace. how convenient it is having brothers! oh, and i've decided to call them by their order ie Brother 1, Brother 2 and so forth. psl confusing when i keep saying 'my brother' all the time.

anyhoo..

doing weights tomoro. i'm liking pumping iron more than cardio lately. prolly coz strength training boosts metabolism more than cardio does, so will definitely kill off the unnecessary kueh boms i had.

much love,
be'ah xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

oooooooohhhhhhhhmmmmmm

so u gotta practice what u preach right. bekos eksyen speaks louder than werds.

ooohhhhhhmmmmmmmmmm.

learnt loads of new stuff today. among them:

i kenot drink/eat an hour before, during and an hour after yoga.

awu kesian aku anie. sekian lama prektis yoga, barutah tau.
and you think i'm a true yogini.

thank u wills for the info. tho it came a mighty bit late. and since we're still on yoga, u cant do yoga inversions ie yg kapla d bawah kaki d atas while u have ur period too. well, michelle says u can do it by the 3rd day. im not sure wats will's take on this.

moving on.

kemarin i killed my ass of in the gym. my arms and quads were still sore this morning. but it was worth it. psl semlm alicakes had a bday bajigy at capers and i ate loads. loads to the point that i literally felt my jeans cut into my tummy. and this doesnt happen anymore (as of late) until last night. mcm, maybe i've mentioned it in a couple of previous posts but atu all exaggerations. anie betul2x terjadi.

and gawd my waist hurted when the waitband cut in :s

but thanx ali for the invites. and the cake was yummy, so thank u to whoever was responsible for the cake.

after capers i stumbled into my aunts and uncle in coffee zone; 3 sisters and a husband. sekaliii upon seeing my bf at my side, one asked 'and you are?' (in a nice aunty-ish way la tu) to which my boyfren promptly replied,

'zul amali' (hehe kiyyut kan. i know! thats why i date with him =p)

then my other aunt said 'we know... thru facebook'

hahahahahahahahaha. cant believe she actually said that. but then, if u knw them, its not reli surprising that they're on facebook. but cute eh.

fyi to mamacits, they were ur cousins. lol.


have i mentioned im going to spore next week? woo-hoo. visiting my mama. surprisingly, im not excited psl the shopping. more psl its gonna be a new place for me. so nda jua luan monotonous my summer anie. anie hari2x gym lunch out ambil adik sekolah tdur ptg and repeat cycle again next day. other than the occasional bday bash sush dinner and the kursus civic.

so yayy. looking forward to spore. oh, and also the fact that its only 1hr 50mins away. sangal my bottom duduk dlm aeroplane for 7hrs straight bah. ie kalau ke hengland.

my shopping list only consists of perfumes and sports stuff plg. other stuff i can get in uk jua. but we'll see. psl this time mummy is around. shapa tau murah rezeki sayaaa *hint hint*

oh hari ini hari jadi bapak saya. saya doakan semoga murah rezeki dan tumpah2x tah segala rezeki yg murah atu kepada saya. hehe.

dan oso to everyone reading this post. mudahan abiskita d murahkan rezeki jua.

lubs lubs
be'ah xxxx

12th of the month

happy 31 months to my one and onleh mister rabzilulu :D

me mum's flown back to spore today. i never post pictures of my out and abouts (to put in nisya's word hehe) but this one is too good to not share here. its been AGES since a picture is taken where every single brother is present. its either one's behind the camera or not around at all.

(and studio pictures dont count)

so i present to you - mi familia.


picture courtesy of the boyfriend who just got back from jakarta.


and here's the final line-up.



yeaps, thats all the boys. its a wonder i turned out girly. hehe.

on the gym front. the mall's was closed becoz it was kiulap branch's 1st year ann. so i didnt go becoz apparently ada some karaoke stuff and sorts. in a gym i tell u. pfft. oh well. manage to find some workout routine sans gear/weights online so methinks i did orrite today. also guzzled two pots of yogurt to avoid eating more chocolate ganache.

no gym is making me resort to desperate measures; i.e *gasp* actually watching what i eat! never have i had to choose yogurt over chocolate. it was always my own selera to want to eat yogurt over chocolate, not because i feared the calories.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [because i dont knw what sound effect suffices here!]

will make up for this lack of chocolate tomoro at the gym. weights and all!

much love,
be'ah xxxxxxxxxxxx

its like a drug

i dont knw if i have mentioned this before or that its obvious to every else but me (until now that is.)

exercising is like a drug. its the endorphins i crave. because i now realise that when i dont go to the gym (on a morning when i'm supposed to, like today!) i get cranky and snap at everyone within a 10 metre radius(oh yes, im loud too).

i always cancel my morning sessions when i've had a late night out the night before because hey, we all need our beauty sleep kan? also i read that theres no point in exercising when ur body's tired. so i texted rose last night to cancel PT. plus, my chest and shoulder muscles were effin' killing me. toldja she made me worked like hell on friday. i was squealing at every last 5 reps on the 3rd set of weights. but the thing is, sunday isnt supposed to be my day off.. it shud be a monday. so i made a deal with myself: no gym, but jog in tasek instead. since my mum's back home, her and my dad have been jogging every other morning.

so that was the plan. instead of waking uber early for more muscle straining weights, i can have an extra 2hrs of snooze time and join my parents in tasek.

what really happened:

mum woke me up at quarter to 8 (okay, i knw maybe most of u may say this is still uber early, but i usually wake up at 5.30am. so there.) and told me to get ready. we were gonna drop of my brother for iqra' lessons and then zoom to tasek. sekalinyaaaa... my youngest brother threw up a fuss. said he doesnt want my mum to go jogging and he wants to spend time with my mum etc etc. pokoknya manja berabis lah ia. di bawa ke tasek, nda mau. so fine, my mum being the understanding and reliable mum she is, cancelled her jogging date with dad and stayed home. me? i decided to retreat back under the covers of my duvet.

its now 8.30 and my youngest brother is currently watching shaun the sheep on tv, oblivious to whether my mum is with him or not. i got out of bed proper 10mins ago because i finally decided i wanted to go to the gym and that i've had enough sleep (and that my arms weren't killing me like last night).

then i discovered the car is gone. my dad went out to send my brother for iqra lessons with the one and only car i can drive.

so here i am, sitting on my bed and venting out the frustration on this post before i snap at more people unnecessarily.

but seriously, I NEED TO WORK UP A SWEAT!!

especially after last night's dinner. the whole family plus boyfren went to emperor's court to celebrate dad's birthday. and we had cake. yummy cake. and we still have leftovers. i havent had breakfast yet. maybe i should have cake for breakfast. im sooo tempted!!

no i dont want cake. i mean i'm tempted by the idea of sitting down and stuffing my face with chocolate ganache cake for my first meal of the day. but i cant because its a one way ticket to a sugar binge. the thing is, when i exercise first thing in the morning, it sets up my meal pattern for the rest of the day. now my whole day will be zonked out. and today theres a wedding and a picnic to go to!


kan menangis ku eeeeh. mebbe imma steal my brother's weights and do some reps.

see wat no exercise does to me???

aftermath

my babu is hooooommmeee!

my daddy's on leave too =D

so ystrdy both picked me up from semeo voctech and we went straight for makan. just the three of us.

its been eons since i've had exclusive manja time with both parents. heee. not that i was manja during lunch. kana kautkan plg itu ini. siuk eeyh. felt like i was 10yrs old again. lol.

i've been away for civic course, hence the absence of updates. also been away from the gym, something which i berabisly detest. which was why i was reluctant to go for the civic course in the first place. but it was compulsory.

oh well. its now done and over with.

didnt manage to do any form of cardio or strength training watsoever in 4 days. unless i count the measly 30mins aerobics session which didnt even make me proper sweat. 4 days was spent listening to countless talks, too little sleep and too much food.

first thing i did when i reached home was get on the weighing scales.

miraculously, with all the nasi lemak and mee gorengs and no exercise and just 4 hrs of sleep every night, i'm happy to say my weight is still the same =D

after catching up with sleep the whole afternoon ystrdy i came back to the gym this morning with a vengeance. spent 30mins on the treadmill jogging at an incline (something i've never done) and rose increased all my weights during PT. then had pilates, which had new moves and oh-so-flattening-tummy moves. woo-hoo.

i'm all hyped up nie. tomoro is latin aero and i'm planning on bringing my heels to class. its much more fun doing salsa and cha cha in heels than sport shoes innit?

anyway, big dinner tomoro night. and interesting attendees too. super excited about it, definitely.

will update once i have the will to write a substantial post. if my posts were ever substantial plg. harhar.

much love,
be'ah xxxxxx

Kurus

ystrdy stood out as the day i am officially kurus.

yea i knw i've lost weight apa, but i've always thought myself as slim, not kurus. kurus may be the same thing plg. lol. but when i hear it i think skinny, not slim. and maybe it was the way the two ppl exclaimed 'kurus jua kau!' at the first sight of me.

first was zimbo, who came by the house to give me her wedding invitation.

her kurus exclaims where punctuated by slaps on my arm and asking 'what did u dooooo?'

we go to high school together waay baack since 1999 but only really got close in form 4. gee, i guess i was really berisi back then. or maybe zimbo's just stressed out about her wedding.

second to loudly exclaim how much weight i've lost was my nini idah, mamacits' mum. i came by their house to get the cake i ordered for the beau. and she was all 'behapa kau kurus-kurus anie?'

this is the woman who saw me grow up from an itty bitty (chubby) baby to a bulat toddler to a fat kid to a braces-wearing teen and now, a 'kurus' twenty-something.

i still need to get the word round my head tho. the fact that they're using kurus instead of 'makin damit jua kau' and the likes. growing up i dont remember ever being at my current weight ever. even when i was 14 i wasnt at this current weight.

but me likey the compliments of course. hehe. shows that the hard work pays off. now when ppl ask me what i do i dont just say 'gym and special k', i now say

'its all hard work. but if u want something and u work for it, it'll happen'. i mean, i know i've always burbled on abt how happy the gym makes me feel and how ecstatic i am when i see the scales go down and how yummy special k is, so imma tell u the flip side of the story.

i do wake up in the morning (with aching muscles) and wanting to go back to sleep or not go to the gym. i do set up super ambitious goals which i usually give up on before long (as the half marathon and biking thing) and i do eat more than the one-portion-per-meal i advocate when the makanan is super yummy (the usual deal-breakers are sushi and kway teow). i do wish that my metabolic rate is super fast so i wudnt have to do weights because i tend to want to give up after the second set of 15 reps.

i do wish that rose would sometimes go slower when she's doing steps and william to count faster when he asks us to hold a pose. and i ALWAYS look at the clock during classes because im hoping its going to finish soon!

but i put my chin up, tailbone in (haha. ppl in william's class will understand) and stayed through it all. i finish my last few weight reps albeit slowly. i go just as fast as rose in steps and i dont let go of a pose till william says 'release'.

because i know its all worth the work.

altho i do sometimes cheat ;) during steps i sometimes stop and just march on the spot till i get my breath back, i release my plank whenever william walks to the back of the class and resume the pose straigtaway when he's looking to the front and i just give up altogether on a last set of reps when i feel i cant do it.

u just gotta know when its okay to cheat. because at times, it is. just dont beat urself up when u cant do what u did last week. acknowledge what u didnt do, move on and start again. like the quote above, weight management is a life-long thing, so theres no full-stop if u wanna keep (or lose) your current weight.

(okay.. i think i've been reading too much of women's health.)

the icing on the (fairy) cake was ystrdy afternoon after i got back from mamacits. i was fooling around with my brothers, taking turns on the bar thing where we do chin ups/pull-ups when one brother lifted me up and threatened to carry me into the toilet to flush me. above my screams for mercy (because we were already in the toilet) and my other brothers' amused and terhibur laughter, i heard my brother (the one who was carrying me) say, 'eh ringan jua kaka anie!'

wooo hoo! typing it down here is like the whipped creamed and the cherry on top. these brothers have forever been calling me fat even at my lowest weigh in, comparing me to their girl friends and girlfrens (who are always always skinny in the real meaning of the word skinny). but now they're actually admitting that i am kurus!!!

now i want a chocolate cake with whipped cream. oooh i want another slice of citscakes! i always let myself indulge in a guilty pleasures after ego-boosters. haha like i said, its okay to cheat sometimes.

much love,
be'ah xxxxxx