friendster status

i was just browsing through frenster and was viewing a friend's recently updated profile. friend is now 'in a relationship' after being single for about 4 months. i think this is friend's 3rd time being 'in a relationship' since friend added me on friendster a year ago. the first two relationships were 'long-term'. yes, this friend will remain anonymous coz this is not a personal lash.

its about common sense and logic and pure sanity and maybe taking a REALISTIC view on love. one of friend's photo caption reads 'madly in love.. finally!' and i cant help thinking to myself 'dont u mean "madly in love.. again?"'

so this is another issue on friendster that isnt really addressed properly. we keep lashing out on testimonials that arent really testimonials, having different acounts but with the same friends (which reminds me, said friend has two accounts and im on both friends list) and the fake trying-to-get-attention-but-nobody-really-calls-u-that name. i FREAKIN' have a problem with people's status issues!

for one thing, i see ppl who say 'its complicated' are ppl in denial or ppl who are just getting to know their beaus. hello? if ur getting to know ur beau, ur still damn single la! its as simple as getting married- if ur not hitched, ur single right? or at least in a relationship. nobody says their status is 'complicated' at the eve of their wedding night. unless of course, it REALLY is complicated, and thats not good.

so let me run thru with what 'its complicated' reli is. for one thing, the dictionary defines complicated as

1. To make or become complex or perplexing.
2. To twist or become twisted together.
3. composed of elaborately interconnected parts; complex: complicated apparatus for measuring brain functions.
4. difficult to analyze, understand, explain, etc.: a complicated problem.

so unless ur status falls under any of the definitions above, dont put 'its complicated'. no shame in being single, i say. and i know most of u guys will relate to number 4. so good for u guys who knw the real meaning. but for those people who, as we say, are 'in process', jgntah kan buat 'its complicated' because its not.

and speaking of which, its amazing how many people my age are married. heck, even ppl younger than me, little 15-yr-olds are married. that is, if ur gullible enough to believe their status on frenster.

hello freakin world! i know u guys are in love, but in love does not, i repeat, does NOT equal being married. yes, u feel like u guys are married, u guys have been together since the day of adam and eve, but for f**ks sake, until u have a ring on ur finger, u are not married! so now lets check out what 'married' means in the dictionary:

1. united in wedlock
2. joined in matrimony

so have u guys exchanged any vows lately? no.. well.. then ur just 'in a relationship' honey, no matter how much in love u are. try getting married for a start to even consider using that 'married' status. oh, what was that? 'hubby; stil in skool? WHAT 'hubby'? oh, u mean BOYFRIEND!

and this married issue irks me more nowadays becoz i actually do have more than a couple of actual-exchanged-vows-signed-certificate-in-front-of-the-imam married frens, so when a long lost fren adds me and their status is 'married' i think 'congratulations!' only to be fooled again. look, im happy that my frens are in love but please use the status appropriately so as to not confuse ppl like me? please and thank u!

anyhow, im a bit off track. let get back to people such as said friend. friend is in love finally/again (however u may see it). all i can say is, ur confusing ppl like me again. when ur single, bukan main saying stuff like 'oh im done with love', 'i dont believe in lov', 'all guys suck' etc etc. skali sudah in love 'oooh i found the one' or 'i love u forever'. this last one irks me especially becoz its like, ur forever somehow doesnt match with mine. okay i wont go thru the dictionary again, but isnt forever like, forever? then why is it that u break up, rant off him and all jerks of the world, then find another guy and say 'i'll love u forever', again?

ppl, i know u should love with all ur heart and i know its nice to love and be loved in return. heck, one of my fave quotes is 'the greatest gift in the world is to love and be loved in return'...

but dont take the word 'forever', lightly. and i know u feel all high (with love) with ur boyfren but when u feel the same with ALL ur boyfrens stop and think. dont u think love's a special feeling for ONE special particular someone? then why are u feeling the same kind of love-high with ALL ur boyfrens? oh yea. maybe its called 'infatuation' or even 'puppy-love'. look up the dictionary urself this time :p

i say true love is when u get thru shitloads of hell and still manage to stay together and feel the same way as the first day u got together. there is no 'the honeymoon stage is over' phase. that honeymoon stage should last throughout ur whole relationship. only THEN can u say ur truly madly deeply in love.. but dont promise forever if u have even the slightest sliver of a doubt of keeping that promise. im not saying dont say 'i love u', but just dont take 'forever' lightly. and i knw the very ppl who say 'i love u forever' are the very ppl who had their hearts broken mercilessly. so dont keep the cycle going by breaking innocent passerbys' hearts.

oh shizzle. haha i just realised my last paragraph was so not a realistic view and have therefore contradicted myself. hey, i can be a realist and a dreamer. its called optimist ;)

the real world

i present to u a scenario. a rape case.

woman is raped by a man. he threatens her with a knife. fearing for her life, she consents and proceeds to take off her clothing. to stall time, she asked for a condom. she wanted everything done and over with so everything was done quickly.

afterwards, woman sends man to a place where he wanted to be dropped off. still fearing for her life, she drove him to the spot. woman engages man in small talk to take his mind off killing her. she still fears that he will change his mind about letting her go.

once the man was out of her sight, woman burst into tears, relieved that it is over but shocked that it happened. she drove to the nearest police station and lodged a report.

the man was charged with rape but found not guilty.

where is justice, u think?

according to law, rape is defined as intentional penile penetration of the vagina, anus or mouth of another person who does not consent to the penetration and that the man does not reasonably believe that the person consents.

and that he has to be proven guilty beyond reasonable doubt.

so i guess there must've been some doubt in convicting the man. maybe the jury and judge saw the woman taking off her clothes as consent.

statistics show that around half of all convictions were results of guilty pleas, but when a full trial took place, an acquittal was the more likely outcome.

sucks, innit?

... but thats life in court.

Chinese New Year Celeb

CNY was fab. my decorations were appreciated - had ppl playing with the balloons and dragons in the end and the food was delish. rezzykin's pudding was a hit and everything was just fun fun fun! everybody looked coordinated and gorgeous wearing red, black and white, colors that conquered the day, with a dash of pink. But the bruneians didnt forget their national day.. we played some brunei traditional songs, altho they made us slighty doze off LOL. anyway, i knw d brunei ppl bebaris today and not ystrdy, so

SELAMAT MEYAMBUT HARI KEBANGSAAN YG KE 23!

enjoy the pictures!



















lastly, i introduce to you the latest sensation to hit the music scene. Bramshaw Babes feat Rabz. their first album called 'panat' will be in stores soon and features nasyid songs with RnB vibes ;p

i'm still alive!

hello everyone~ haha mcm apa sja my title ah. the thing is, i feel like its been forver since i havent posted anything. baru plg 3 days. but i guess coz a lots been happening so yea. just some quickies to let u guys knw im still safe and healthy.

BUT before that, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SYAMIE! its today rite? i thot 22nd but frenster syas its today so today tah tu. semoga d berkati Allah SWT dan d murahkan rezeki, panjang umur, the works =)

so its been zapin practice over and over agen. not to mention meeting my essay deadline. hopefully i do better for that essay than the last time. zapin practice has taken form, another rehearsal and then we do a DRESS rehearsal one! so ppl, cooome and see our costumes!! all i can say is, the outfit is payaah to cari! but i went to town tdi with bianca, nis and met up with tok guru aka elina (jgn marah elina~) hehe and we found turtlenecks and tights. but there werent many so only me and elina got one. and i also got tights! so now all thats left for me to get is a black scarf to wear over my head.

to my family: yes, i'm still gonna wear my tudong during zapin =D

erm.. okay apa lgi ah. this post as u can see, is basically random stuff. watever comes to mind i type. so CNY is coming, and im in charge of deco, and i went to town tdi with the intention of buying a zapin outfit and decoratiosn stuff BUT i totally forgot abt the decorations!!! instead, i bought myself a nice pair of red shoes, thinking i;ll wear them for CNY.

HELLO! i forgot decorations but remembered shoes for CNY!

typical plg tu... =p

oh and the bf hasnt been feeling well lately, but now he's a bit better, thank god. been worried abt tthat coz when he's damam, ts like, foreverness bah. but its looking good now. his job doesnt help either. KALAU OFF-DAY, DONT CALL HIM OKAY FAX??

haha. menteeelll.. but still. he xplained to me sumthing abt if u have a blocked nose them flying makes it worse. i wont bore u with details but basically the worst case scenario wud be him damaging his eardrum, license taken away, job revoked, i have a boyfren with no job..

THEN HOW WILL I GET MY FAIRYTALE WEDDING??

na'uzubillah!

oohhh.. which reminds me. i've been thinking and thinking abt weddings (haha. sorry bu. but im still doing my work, serius.) and sumtimes i think, why go thro all the hype of nikah, bebadak, sanding, ambil-ambilan and mulih 3 hari? ngalih sja.. then u spend lots of money.. sumtimes even on ppl u dont even knw (like wedding crashers or ur grand aunt's daugther-in-law's brother or sumthing) i thot, nikah sja bah!

haha so i had this idea abt just a small cosy nikah ceremony. i want it to be meaningful, with the ppl i KNOW and love and will appreciate the meaning of joining two kekasihs in holy matrimony. bukan kan dtg psl makan free. but mind u, i want it classy. since its only that one ceremony, literally, for my wedding, i thot i shud pull out all the stops. so i was thinking radzuan radziwill, tres chic wedding planner nadiah ahmad rafie (u've never heard of her? shes very pemes u knw!!), millions of fresh white lilies, pink lilies, white roses and pink roses, favors/campurs taht are personalised, david cheok, WHITE limo for when the bf-soon-to-be-hubby arrives, customized cream carpet from c kapet kwn ka nadz, and yes ka, still a million flowr girls (suruh tia c tasya mengumpul kawan2x banyak),maybe catered by empire hotel.. haha the works la!

.. so wat do u think bu?

okay nevermind. haha i knw u wont answer that. oh and constant references to my mummy reminds me that now i can regularly skype with my family. they just bought a couple of macbooks so yea we skype now. just as long as it doesnt clash with my skype time with the boyfie =p hehe nadawah. both get equal chances. baik jua time durang free anie nda sama.

anyhoos.. i am still a donut addict. bianca says i look like a manic. mana ada B! haha well u wudnt undertsand that plg.. haha ask me next time. but rezzykins is in london., and that measn krispy kreme! HURRAY!!

okay sekian wabillahitaufiq walhidayah. assalamu'alaikum warramatullahiwabarakatuh

eeeeeeee c rabz EMO!

atu bah. i have a few shoutouts to give out.

to my brothers: kaka mau baaaliiikkk!!! kaka mau makan nasi katokkk!!!

to the boyfren: sayaaaaaaang me mau mkn sushiiii!!!

to effy: feeeee lajutah mkn d mamiiiiih!

to izzah: zzzzaaah! solitude! tiramisu?

buyai: yai! bah, fratinis ah nanti

bianca: i waaaant donutttsss!!

kaka McNuts: UIIIII lajutah mkn d wagamama!

lydz: aku mauuu mee jawaaaa

fifi: feeeeeeeeeeeeeeee i want chicken rice!!

to jirin: beluuutaaaaakkkk!!!

erm.. apa lgi ah. haha makanan sja nie. sehat nie. hahahahahaha.

err. MENTEEELLL~ saya rindu masakan barunai.

peace.

karma

This song is obviously about karma. i cant help but relate to it.. although im on the other side of the story ie the cheater. but i fell in love with this song sooo much that i've decided to do a whole post on karma, or actually, how karma bit me back in the ass, hard! :s

oh and just to make this fun without the whole serious shit of what goes around comes aorund, i give u the lyrics so u can sing along =p

Hey girl, is he everything you wanted in a man?
You know I gave you the world
You had me in the palm of your hand
So why your love went away
I just can't seem to understand
Thought it was me and you babe
Me and you until the end
But I guess I was wrong

Don't want to think about it
Don't want to talk about it
I'm just so sick about it
Can't believe it's ending this way
Just so confused about it
Feeling the blues about it
I just can't do without ya
Tell me is this fair?

Is this the way it's really going down?
Is this how we say goodbye?
Should've known better when you came around
That you were gonna make me cry
It's breaking my heart to watch you run around
'Cause I know that you're living a lie
That's okay baby 'cause in time you will find...

What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around

Now girl, I remember everything that you claimed
You said that you were moving on now
And maybe I should do the same
Funny thing about that is
I was ready to give you my name
Thought it was me and you, babe
And now, it's all just a shame
And I guess I was wrong

Don't want to think about it
Don't want to talk about it
I'm just so sick about it
Can't believe it's ending this way
Just so confused about it
Feeling the blues about it
I just can't do without ya
Can you tell me is this fair?

Is this the way things are going down?
Is this how we say goodbye?
Should've known better when you came around
(should've known better that you were gonna make me cry)
That you were going to make me cry
Now it's breaking my heart to watch you run around
'Cause I know that you're living a lie
That's okay baby 'cause in time you will find

What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around

What goes around comes around
Yeah
What goes around comes around
You should know that
What goes around comes around
Yeah
What goes around comes around
You should know that

Don't want to think about it (no)
Don't want to talk about it
I'm just so sick about it
Can't believe it's ending this way
Just so confused about it
Feeling the blues about it (yeah)
I just can't do without ya
Tell me is this fair?

Is this the way things are going down?
Is this how we say goodbye?
Should've known better when you came around
(should've known better that you were gonna make me cry)
That you were going to make me cry
Now it's breaking my heart to watch you run around
'Cause I know that you're living a lie
But that's okay baby 'cause in time you will find

What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around
What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around

[Comes Around interlude:]

Let me paint this picture for you, baby

You spend your nights alone
And he never comes home
And every time you call him
All you get's a busy tone
I heard you found out
That he's doing to you
What you did to me
Ain't that the way it goes

You cheated girl
My heart bleeds girl
So it goes without saying that you left me feeling hurt
Just a classic case
A scenario
Tale as old as time
Girl you got what you deserved

And now you want somebody
To cure the lonely nights
You wish you had somebody
That could come and make it right

But girl I ain't somebody with a lot of sympathy
You'll see

(What goes around comes back around)
I thought I told ya, hey
(What goes around comes back around)
I thought I told ya, hey
(What goes around comes back around)
I thought I told ya, hey
(What goes around comes back around)
I thought I told ya, hey

[laughs]
See?
You should've listened to me, baby
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Because
(What goes around comes back around)
[laughs]

the story: how karma got me back (i realised this was more appropriate than 'how karma bit me in the ass)


back in 2004, i was happily dating faidan for about 4mths then. come may/june of that year, started seeing McNut's brother. see, here is where i fault. i cheated on my then-boyfren. i can argue that i lost contact with faidan, and that McNut's brother was always thre for me. so who can u blame, huh?

of course. karma got me immediately just when i thot i would have a happy ending.i wont go into details, but obviously my relationship with McNut's bro didnt work- it was my most painful and heartbreaking relationship ever and the break-up that followed suit, although 'amiable', was like a stake that pierced my heart. to add salt to the wound, my friendship with him can never be as it was before. but i guess its better this way. he was also the only ex-boyfren that i had to take time to get over with. oh yes, karma bit me REAL hard.

so after that episode, who could blame me but to go to my old ways? i didnt go back to cheating, but i was never serious with a guy after that. i can remember hurting two guys after that. i went out with them, they fell for me, but i said 'no, not interested in anything serious'.

so there u go. and what goes around comes back around. so after those 2 guys, i actualy found a guy who i could see potential relationship material. but karma got me! he didnt want me like i wanted him. OUCH! till this day this guy i still hate and despise. haha.

oooh but now for the fun part. my happy ending =D

after all that pain and heartache and the tears, especially with McNut's brother, i have finally (i hope) found my one and only. we met thru his sister and he is the best ever boyfren that i can ever wish for. i know jodoh d tangan tuhan, and of course God has better plans than what we've made for ourselves, but have a little faith. what you've worked for is probably what God wanted u to have.

so i have my happy ending now. next agenda will be the fairytale wedding hehehe. opps, i knw my mum reads my blog. so okay, bu, i want a BIG wedding. just so u'll be prepared at the magnitude of how i want my wedding hehe.

p/s some of u guys will probably think of 'si kawan' while i write abt this whole karma thing. well im not worried, coz that case is one of the few cases that i truly believed was deserved, although its not in our hands to give back karma. oh well. well see what happens next coz if anything does happen, it'll definitely go up here. in the meantime, enjoy the song!

doo bie doo bi dum dum~

so i got bored.. and tada! haha. betchu ka nadz wants aundrey and fifi wants grace :p

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oooh and i just found out that rosie has a blog. but she doesnt haf a tagboard yet! so rosie, this post is dedicated to u. welcome to the blogging world =)